CategoriesEquipping Events, Mentoring Matters by

Spiritual mentors help us “grow up” in Christ

Apostle Paul says in Ephesians 4, “We must no longer be children… But speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ…” That’s the purpose of our spiritual formation—to grow up into Christ.

Jim Houston said, “If we have been born again, then we must also be taught to live again.” God is up to something in the world—calling us to grow up into Christ in the company of others, a companionship of shared participation in Jesus. This shared participation binds us, creating a sense of belonging and connection in our spiritual journey.

Spiritual mentors help Jesus-followers to “grow up.” They help us navigate our inner landscape, shining a light on the shadows we struggle to see. Helping others grow up into Christ rests on an understanding and conviction that the primary shaping work in a person’s life belongs to God.

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do 

(Ephesians 2:10, NIV).”

Our burden as people, and as mentors in particular, is to first be alert and receptive to God’s relentlessly creative handiwork in the world. Our best thinking, acting, listening, asking questions, and praying are secondary to and cooperative with the Spirit’s work.

But what qualifies spiritual mentors to say to another, “I have something to say about you and God in your life?”

First, we do not say, “Imitate me because I have it all together, all figured out, and am a big shot expert in the field of spirituality.” Instead, we say, as did Paul: “Imitate me as I (do my best to) imitate Christ.” It is that alone. Not our degrees or books we’ve read, our experience, or our leadership position.

Secondly, the essence of a mentor-mentee relationship lies in the art of humble curiosity. As mentors, we are never alone with a mentee. We are always in the presence of Another to whom we listen. The Spirit is present in that office or living room, and our mission at that moment is to listen. It is not to form our “answers” or prepare a little sermonette but to listen, ask more questions, and pray. 

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Our next  Mentor’s Workshop is November 19, 2024, from 7:30-8:45 PM CT. You can join the waiting list to be the first to get a notification when registration opens.

CategoriesA Mentoring Guide, Equipping Events, Spiritual Conversation by

What do you listen for?

There is no one-size-fits-all technique for mentoring. So don’t try to squeeze yourself into a mold of how others mentor. Be open to discovering the ways the Spirit has uniquely wired you to pay attention and companion others.

That said, there is much we can learn from other wise people who have walked well with others. VantagePoint3’s founder Randy Reese is one of those wise friends in my life from whom I learned much over the years.

A couple of years before his sudden passing six years ago I asked him on a webinar, As a mentor or spiritual friend to many, Randy, are there certain things you listen for along the way? Read More

CategoriesEquipping Events, Spiritual Conversation, The Art of Dialogue by

A Longing for Spiritual Conversation…

A few years ago I stumbled across a journal entry of Henri Nouwen; and as so often before, his words deeply resonated with my heart. Nouwen wrote,

“I have come to realize how hard it is to have a real spiritual conversation. I keep wondering how people with deep religious convictions can speak together at table about the life of the Spirit…. It always strikes me how grateful people are for a good spiritual conversation, but also how hard it is to make such a conversation happen.”

In the circles in which I move, I sense a longing among people for better conversations, more soulish conversations, conversations around the big questions and wonderings of their lives. And yet, despite all this longing, people confess a reluctance, or perhaps inability, to initiate such spiritual conversations. Why is this and what can we, who feel such things, do about it? 

From youth soccer sidelines or neighborhood chit chat to informal dinner conversations to small group Bible Studies or mentoring appointments, how can we deepen our conversations?

To begin with, I want to invite you to watch our webinar Jump Starts for Intentional Spiritual Conversations, in which we dove into this set of questions. 

In preparation for this time, I found myself deeply affirming that the quality of conversation we offer others is inextricably tied to the quality of attention we provide others. How then can we grow in an attentiveness that leads to cultivating more meaningful spiritual conversation? 

Three initial thoughts come to mind, growing edges of sorts, for those of us who long for better spiritual companionship and conversation.  Read More